Feeling Small

With Eric and the boys off work and school for a couple of weeks, we thought we would be able to get a LOT done outside.  The chipper equipment finally arrived, and Eric and the boys spent a day putting it together.  Unfortunately, the manual was left within reach of the puppy, and yes, he got a hold of it and chewed it to pieces.  C and I spent an hour or two flattening out and taping together what we could of the manual so the guys could at least get it put together.  (We've ordered a new one.)
  The  weather has been relatively cooperative, and we should have sunshine the rest of the week. Got to love the break from the rain, and the timing of it!  However, anyone who has lived in the maritime NW knows that sunny skies in winter means no marine layer to keep in the heat, so it's COLD out there.  In the 30's.  The only way to keep warm is to keep moving.  With gloves, hats,  wool sweaters, and down jackets and plenty of layers between, we can keep pretty warm, but once the sun gets below the tree line it's icy winds...the kind that finds every tiny pore in your clothing to infiltrate, and blows your face numb.
  Add to that cold the seemingly continual failure of equipment, and morale dips pretty low.  You begin to look around you at the enormity of the project and it makes you  feel very SMALL.  Like,  you're in way over your head and this tiny little tractor might not be able to do what it needs to do...and you may not have enough hours in a day/week/month to get things done.
  We were so thrilled to get our new chipper, but already we realise it's limitations.  It does not do well with WET branches.  In fact, it is not designed for wet or muddy branches Which is primarily what we have, as most of the branches were stripped of bark during the logging process, and were partially buried in mud. They were too slick to grip in the rotating wheel, and the dirt was hard on the blades. We spent a lot of time jockeying them around to get them to go through the machine.  We have already dulled the blades after only 15 yards of chips.  I don't know how hard it's going to be to sharpen the blades, but I know it will take some time to take it all apart to get to them.  For now, we are putting the whole chipping project aside until everything dries out.  It's a waste of time and energy otherwise.  Bummer.  I guess chipping is just not going to be a winter project.
  The next thing we need to focus on is clearing the land.  We will have to re-attach the backhoe attachment for that. (No problem as we have a quick release/attachment piece,) And we need to sharpen EVERY CHAINSAW BLADE we have, so that we don't have to stop to sharpen when we're in the middle of things, which is extremely frustrating.  Breaks the momentum.
  We have designated an area for dumping those muddy sticks and branches that we now  will be using to fill the trenches with, rather than chipping.  Next to that pile is the wood chip pile.  Next to that is the fire log pile,  And then there are the stumps that seem to have no place to go.  We can't burn them, or they will alkalise the soil.  We may just have to pile them someplace to rot, or else dig a hole and bury them.  They are too awkward and bulky for trenches, unless those trenches were extremely deep. Hmmm...

  On the positive side, the last couple of days we have had help, which has been so nice.  My brother came over from Seattle and spent an afternoon chipping wood with us, and my mom came over unexpectedly and cooked dinner for us 2 nights in a row!  How wonderful it was to come in cold and hungry and smell the delicious aroma of roasting meat and baking bread!!  It was such a blessing! I couldn't believe our good fortune!!  The kids thought it was pretty great, too, especially as we were running low on groceries and eating a lot of leftovers or simple meals...
  Also, the boys have been working hard with us out there, and C has been doing what she can to help, too. We never make them work as hard as we work, or as long, and they have appreciated that.  We have always made it our policy not to ask our kids to do what we ourselves would not want to do, and we work right alongside of them.  There have been times when we've all had to work extremely hard and long hours but those are the exceptions, not the rule. We want to be teaching a strong work ethic, but we don't want to be fostering resentment.  This is our dream after all.  They will benefit, too, of course, but we do not see our kids as a source of slave labor.
  The cleared trees have given us a great view of the sky, and it's pretty to see the sun on the tops of the far off trees.  We have so much more sunlight in the house, too!  I love it!
  Today down in the field I asked Eric, "Do you feel like we're in over our heads with this project?"  He said, "Yes, but then I always feel that way with our projects.  You have to throw yourself in and then find your way out."   He's right.  It's OK to feel small, as long as you don't let it overwhelm you.